prideful
I started writing this last night and for the life of me, I couldn't find the right words to fit what I wanted to say. Part of it may have been that I was tired. Part of it is that I don't know if there are big enough words to explain the lesson I learned yesterday.
I'm going to try to find the right words, though and hopefully these words will convey something bigger than words.
I'm very thankful and grateful for what's going on downstairs. I mean that. My gratitude goes beyond real words and thank you doesn't seem to be enough, sometimes. I told that to my contractor today. I'm really thankful for everything he's done downstairs. It's absolutely beautiful in my eyes and so much better than what was. There are still reminders of what was, but what is blends in so nicely.
Anyway, I was showing some of the guys I was working with the photos of my new plumbing fixture last night, when that still small voice asked me a very pointed question: "Are you showing, or showing off?" Having been a bit(?) of a showoff, I know I'm quite capable of this. It was the furthest thing from my mind but if the question was asked, then either I was or was about to. So I stopped, in mid stride and offered up a small confession to God for the sin of pride.
What I am is grateful and thankful. I think it's all right to want to share the excitement of having a remodeled basement, but what's not all right is to be boastful of it. Honestly, my intent isn't to boast and I mean that. If I've come across that way, then I apologize. I talk about it because it's kind of a big thing in my life and I hope I do so with a sense of gratitude to God, who blessed me with both the trial of having to deal with this ordeal, and in ways only He could do, blessed me with the gifts of carpet, paint, real walls, and every nail, board, and fiber that have gone into this project.
The larger point, though, is that it's easy for ust to focus on things and if I hadn't had that question asked of me last night, something as simple as a piece of porcelain can become an idol if put before God. And it can happen that quick. My focus isn't on the thing. It's giving glory to God who gave the thing to me.
God does a lot for me and I haven't shared too much of it lately because I'm learning that some things are best kept private. But He's at work, helping me, providing for me. And I mean that! I'm well-blessed and thankful for not just things. I'm grateful for the friendships I'm building these days. I'm excited about the future things God will lead me to. I'm thankful and quite content in the circumstances I find myself in today because I'm right where He wants me to be. And I'm humbled that the Creator of all things would be willing to forgive the things I've done and provide for me in so many ways. To be able to have a relationship with God! I'm very cognizant that I don't deserve that relationship, but through God's grace and the sacrifice of Christ on the cross, I can have that relationship.
And I'm thankful for God's Holy Spirit asking me a simple question that made me take a look at my heart and make sure it was where it should be.
I'm going to try to find the right words, though and hopefully these words will convey something bigger than words.
I'm very thankful and grateful for what's going on downstairs. I mean that. My gratitude goes beyond real words and thank you doesn't seem to be enough, sometimes. I told that to my contractor today. I'm really thankful for everything he's done downstairs. It's absolutely beautiful in my eyes and so much better than what was. There are still reminders of what was, but what is blends in so nicely.
Anyway, I was showing some of the guys I was working with the photos of my new plumbing fixture last night, when that still small voice asked me a very pointed question: "Are you showing, or showing off?" Having been a bit(?) of a showoff, I know I'm quite capable of this. It was the furthest thing from my mind but if the question was asked, then either I was or was about to. So I stopped, in mid stride and offered up a small confession to God for the sin of pride.
What I am is grateful and thankful. I think it's all right to want to share the excitement of having a remodeled basement, but what's not all right is to be boastful of it. Honestly, my intent isn't to boast and I mean that. If I've come across that way, then I apologize. I talk about it because it's kind of a big thing in my life and I hope I do so with a sense of gratitude to God, who blessed me with both the trial of having to deal with this ordeal, and in ways only He could do, blessed me with the gifts of carpet, paint, real walls, and every nail, board, and fiber that have gone into this project.
The larger point, though, is that it's easy for ust to focus on things and if I hadn't had that question asked of me last night, something as simple as a piece of porcelain can become an idol if put before God. And it can happen that quick. My focus isn't on the thing. It's giving glory to God who gave the thing to me.
God does a lot for me and I haven't shared too much of it lately because I'm learning that some things are best kept private. But He's at work, helping me, providing for me. And I mean that! I'm well-blessed and thankful for not just things. I'm grateful for the friendships I'm building these days. I'm excited about the future things God will lead me to. I'm thankful and quite content in the circumstances I find myself in today because I'm right where He wants me to be. And I'm humbled that the Creator of all things would be willing to forgive the things I've done and provide for me in so many ways. To be able to have a relationship with God! I'm very cognizant that I don't deserve that relationship, but through God's grace and the sacrifice of Christ on the cross, I can have that relationship.
And I'm thankful for God's Holy Spirit asking me a simple question that made me take a look at my heart and make sure it was where it should be.
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