Sometimes you know the lion you fight really well
I read a book a while back called In a Pit With a Lion on a Snowy Day. Great book. The story from the Bible it uses as an example is one where the captain of King David's bodyguards is described as a brave man who once went into a pit on a snowy day to vanquish a lion. It has modern day application too about fighting things that appear you can't win.
I fought a lion for a long time. The best I can say is that my lion fought me to a draw. Every now and again, something or someone will try to entice me to fight that battle again. The thing is, I'm confident I could win the battle. I'm itching to fight lions again. I'm committed to victory! I need some kind of a victory in my life right now! I mean that. The confidence in knowing I can win that victory comes from knowing that God isn't on my side. That may sound counter to a lot of what I say on the blog, but it makes perfect sense. I'm not asking God to be on my side. That's ridiculous. If I have learned anything on my walk, it's that if I need God to be on my side, then I'm on the wrong side.
I need to be on God's side.
I said sometimes I know the lions we fight really well, because sometimes the struggle is one between the heart and the head. The best thing one can do in those circumstances is default to what God has given us for answers. In that, the head wins. My heart wants me to fight an entirely different battle.
The battle the head wants me to fight seems to be full of closed doors lately. The thing is, that with application of God's word, I can't seem to find justification to fight the battle on my heart. I'm reminded that Scripture tells us that the heart is wicked and can't be trusted. i'm also cognizant of the fact that I'm trying to let go of my own heart and have the Holy Spirit fill it with what's good and right. Fighting battles for someone else's heart is bad enough. Fighting your own is another matter entirely.
And even the best men sometimes lose that battle. I know King David did. I'm trying not to.
For the other part of this, I'm a lion fighter in search of a lion, I suppose. What doors God opens for me to fight lions is another matter entirely. I wanna go! I'm itching to go. But just what doors are open and closed by God remains to be seen.
Sometimes waiting is a battle with it's own brand of lion called impatience. That for me is a tough lion to fight, especially in the snow. I've talked about running ahead of God. I wanna make sure I don't.
As I fight the lion that is my own heart, I find myself being bombarded with scripture references. I've been hit with stuff about unbelievers. I've been to the go, kill, eat, reference and am reminded of how Peter must've felt. His first reaction was "surely not Lord". That's pretty much been mine too. To fight that battle, I'm reminded that when the Evil One tempted Jesus in the desert, he used scripture and Jesus fought back with Scripture. Temptation is a tough lion to fight, especially when there's doubt about whether or not it was God opening a door.
I don't know if that's the case or not. I don't have an answer to that past what is written.
I find myself sometimes in the battle of my heart having the brain get involved. There's part of the brain that's connected to the heart. I find myself being tempted to use a well-meaning gesture to reach out to someone. I know that thought, while very benign on the surface, very, well "innocent" of motive is anything but. It's why I don't. There's nothing innocent about it.
I want the scoop. The scoop, however, is none of my business. Curiosity is another lion to fight sometimes.
The battle of head over heart usually prevails. The battle my head says to fight is another matter entirely. There's no clear evidence that I should fight it either, past a verse of Scripture in 1 Corinthians I can't seem to find a way around and the fact that I love Jesus and want to obey His commands. As I said though, the best way I can describe that battle is closed doors. I'm also reminded that God is a God who gives and takes away. It's tough to know what to do and no answers seem to be forthcoming. I don't like tests. I like failing them even less because the remedial training required to pass tests is often painful. I'm trying to stay out of God's woodshed by staying on His side and abandoning my own.
For the longest time in life, I made God out to be who I wanted Him to be. When Jesus found me, He quickly showed me the Father I needed so desperately and it turns out that God is who HE says HE is, not what Dale (or you for that matter) wants or needs Him to be. He is I AM. What we are is created by and for Him, not the other way around.
That realization keeps me right now from lion fighting, except the ones that are my own. As I do that though, I can tell you that there are lions on the periphery of my life I may need to face and I'm itching to do that. I'm a fight looking for a lion right now. (I don't mean that in the sense that I'm looking to start a physical fight with someone. I'm not talking about that kind of fight!)
The fight with my heart depends on God revealing to me whether or not He put what's on it there. The battle the head is leaning to requires God to intervene first and open doors, change perceptions, and reveal His truth. Those are things I can't do. I can't fight a lion hoping God is on my side. I need to be on God's side and see where that takes me.
That's where I'm at today. Wanting to be on God's side and waiting on further instructions.
And now, I'm gonna take a nap before work.
I fought a lion for a long time. The best I can say is that my lion fought me to a draw. Every now and again, something or someone will try to entice me to fight that battle again. The thing is, I'm confident I could win the battle. I'm itching to fight lions again. I'm committed to victory! I need some kind of a victory in my life right now! I mean that. The confidence in knowing I can win that victory comes from knowing that God isn't on my side. That may sound counter to a lot of what I say on the blog, but it makes perfect sense. I'm not asking God to be on my side. That's ridiculous. If I have learned anything on my walk, it's that if I need God to be on my side, then I'm on the wrong side.
I need to be on God's side.
I said sometimes I know the lions we fight really well, because sometimes the struggle is one between the heart and the head. The best thing one can do in those circumstances is default to what God has given us for answers. In that, the head wins. My heart wants me to fight an entirely different battle.
The battle the head wants me to fight seems to be full of closed doors lately. The thing is, that with application of God's word, I can't seem to find justification to fight the battle on my heart. I'm reminded that Scripture tells us that the heart is wicked and can't be trusted. i'm also cognizant of the fact that I'm trying to let go of my own heart and have the Holy Spirit fill it with what's good and right. Fighting battles for someone else's heart is bad enough. Fighting your own is another matter entirely.
And even the best men sometimes lose that battle. I know King David did. I'm trying not to.
For the other part of this, I'm a lion fighter in search of a lion, I suppose. What doors God opens for me to fight lions is another matter entirely. I wanna go! I'm itching to go. But just what doors are open and closed by God remains to be seen.
Sometimes waiting is a battle with it's own brand of lion called impatience. That for me is a tough lion to fight, especially in the snow. I've talked about running ahead of God. I wanna make sure I don't.
As I fight the lion that is my own heart, I find myself being bombarded with scripture references. I've been hit with stuff about unbelievers. I've been to the go, kill, eat, reference and am reminded of how Peter must've felt. His first reaction was "surely not Lord". That's pretty much been mine too. To fight that battle, I'm reminded that when the Evil One tempted Jesus in the desert, he used scripture and Jesus fought back with Scripture. Temptation is a tough lion to fight, especially when there's doubt about whether or not it was God opening a door.
I don't know if that's the case or not. I don't have an answer to that past what is written.
I find myself sometimes in the battle of my heart having the brain get involved. There's part of the brain that's connected to the heart. I find myself being tempted to use a well-meaning gesture to reach out to someone. I know that thought, while very benign on the surface, very, well "innocent" of motive is anything but. It's why I don't. There's nothing innocent about it.
I want the scoop. The scoop, however, is none of my business. Curiosity is another lion to fight sometimes.
The battle of head over heart usually prevails. The battle my head says to fight is another matter entirely. There's no clear evidence that I should fight it either, past a verse of Scripture in 1 Corinthians I can't seem to find a way around and the fact that I love Jesus and want to obey His commands. As I said though, the best way I can describe that battle is closed doors. I'm also reminded that God is a God who gives and takes away. It's tough to know what to do and no answers seem to be forthcoming. I don't like tests. I like failing them even less because the remedial training required to pass tests is often painful. I'm trying to stay out of God's woodshed by staying on His side and abandoning my own.
For the longest time in life, I made God out to be who I wanted Him to be. When Jesus found me, He quickly showed me the Father I needed so desperately and it turns out that God is who HE says HE is, not what Dale (or you for that matter) wants or needs Him to be. He is I AM. What we are is created by and for Him, not the other way around.
That realization keeps me right now from lion fighting, except the ones that are my own. As I do that though, I can tell you that there are lions on the periphery of my life I may need to face and I'm itching to do that. I'm a fight looking for a lion right now. (I don't mean that in the sense that I'm looking to start a physical fight with someone. I'm not talking about that kind of fight!)
The fight with my heart depends on God revealing to me whether or not He put what's on it there. The battle the head is leaning to requires God to intervene first and open doors, change perceptions, and reveal His truth. Those are things I can't do. I can't fight a lion hoping God is on my side. I need to be on God's side and see where that takes me.
That's where I'm at today. Wanting to be on God's side and waiting on further instructions.
And now, I'm gonna take a nap before work.
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