The only way is up
I had a bit of an epiphany last night. I was listening to a radio program I enjoy which was kind of an answer to a prayer I had earlier. About half-way through the program, though, I came to realize something. That something we'll get to in a minute.
A good part of being a Christian is enjoying fellowship with fellow Christians. Some churches have this group or that. I work nights and attend a small church, so groups aren't exactly for me. Often times, there are things I'd like to attend that I miss, but for the most part, missing out on those things isn't a hardship. They're things I'd like to do, but can't because I work. They're not groups per-se, but more activities, like Bible study or sharing a hot dog in the summer.
If my church did have a group thingie, there's really no group I fit into. I'm not a couple. I'm not single. I'm not a widow. What I am, for lack of a proper term, is alone.
I realize it's by choice so we'll skip that. And I'm not whining or complaining. It's just something I came to realize. I've tried not being alone but that hasn't worked out so hot. Trust me. June and I were talking about this for a while this morning and she said that nobody believes me because nobody saw first hand like she had what happens when I try to fix(?) it. Her conclusion is that if y'all had witnessed it first hand, you'd quit encouraging me to do do something about it.
Her take, in so many words, is that it's good to fear God.
I agree.
Anyway, back to the story.
It came to me that even if I had the opportunity to be part of a group, which group do I fit in. As I outlined, I'm married, but have nobody to belong to a group of couples. I'm not single, so dating is out of the question. I have guy friends, but sometimes you miss the company of the opposite sex but that, even if it was harmless, would hurt my witness. It might be all kinds of innocent, but even so, if someone I know sees me, then it gives off the appearance of saying one thing and doing another.
My military friends understand you can get in trouble for doing nothing wrong but having it look like you did. Appearance is everything, sometimes.
So, when you're stuck what do you do?
Look up!
What I'm not doing is whining today. It's just another way of looking at what's happening in another context. I do know that good things have happened in the midst of this. I'm learning to look up more. I'm learning new things almost every week. I'm learning to trust God. OK, that's heavy emphasis on the word learning. Sometimes it's hard to trust when you don't know where you're going, but still, I'm trying. When I fall, I dust myself off, repent, and keep trying to overcome.
Today's been a unique day. Sometimes, you ask for something and God gives you what you ask for. I asked him last night to help me do alone better. He did, with some good Bible verses and some very timely reminders. My Facebook page this morning was loaded up with memes about trusting God even when you can't see where you're going, and about being an overcomer by continually repenting and getting up when you stumble. OK, I'm willing.
Look, I don't understand. I can't. I just know I can't go backward. I can't go to the left, or the right, and there's an ocean in front of me and I don't have a boat. The only way out of this is going to be up, and today, up is where I'm looking.
A good part of being a Christian is enjoying fellowship with fellow Christians. Some churches have this group or that. I work nights and attend a small church, so groups aren't exactly for me. Often times, there are things I'd like to attend that I miss, but for the most part, missing out on those things isn't a hardship. They're things I'd like to do, but can't because I work. They're not groups per-se, but more activities, like Bible study or sharing a hot dog in the summer.
If my church did have a group thingie, there's really no group I fit into. I'm not a couple. I'm not single. I'm not a widow. What I am, for lack of a proper term, is alone.
I realize it's by choice so we'll skip that. And I'm not whining or complaining. It's just something I came to realize. I've tried not being alone but that hasn't worked out so hot. Trust me. June and I were talking about this for a while this morning and she said that nobody believes me because nobody saw first hand like she had what happens when I try to fix(?) it. Her conclusion is that if y'all had witnessed it first hand, you'd quit encouraging me to do do something about it.
Her take, in so many words, is that it's good to fear God.
I agree.
Anyway, back to the story.
It came to me that even if I had the opportunity to be part of a group, which group do I fit in. As I outlined, I'm married, but have nobody to belong to a group of couples. I'm not single, so dating is out of the question. I have guy friends, but sometimes you miss the company of the opposite sex but that, even if it was harmless, would hurt my witness. It might be all kinds of innocent, but even so, if someone I know sees me, then it gives off the appearance of saying one thing and doing another.
My military friends understand you can get in trouble for doing nothing wrong but having it look like you did. Appearance is everything, sometimes.
So, when you're stuck what do you do?
Look up!
What I'm not doing is whining today. It's just another way of looking at what's happening in another context. I do know that good things have happened in the midst of this. I'm learning to look up more. I'm learning new things almost every week. I'm learning to trust God. OK, that's heavy emphasis on the word learning. Sometimes it's hard to trust when you don't know where you're going, but still, I'm trying. When I fall, I dust myself off, repent, and keep trying to overcome.
Today's been a unique day. Sometimes, you ask for something and God gives you what you ask for. I asked him last night to help me do alone better. He did, with some good Bible verses and some very timely reminders. My Facebook page this morning was loaded up with memes about trusting God even when you can't see where you're going, and about being an overcomer by continually repenting and getting up when you stumble. OK, I'm willing.
Look, I don't understand. I can't. I just know I can't go backward. I can't go to the left, or the right, and there's an ocean in front of me and I don't have a boat. The only way out of this is going to be up, and today, up is where I'm looking.
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