Like a little kid sometimes

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If I could change one thing about me it would be that sometimes I tend to get excited like a little kid.  I find myself there again today.

There is just something exciting about this new year.

Maybe it's that there's something happening this year that hasn't happened for so long.

I have hope.

It's a different thing than the hope I've had over the last three years.  For the last three years, I've hoped that things would work out.  They didn't and it's like the last week of 2013, as I've mentioned (too many times!) it's as if the books on 2013 needed to be closed.  OK, they're closed.

So, I find myself today a hopeful Christian.  I'm available for whatever God has for me, whatever that will be.  I'm unencumbered by stuff.  I'm OK with being alone.  I'm ready for something new and maybe, just maybe the good things I tried to sow in 2013 will be reaped this year.

I've been beat down for so long, gang, that I can't tell you what relief I feel heading into this year.  It's a totally different feeling than I've ever had before.  Usually I just go through the motions and try to survive.  I think this year is going to be about living because things are done with and over.  There's no what if's anymore.  It's just in the past now.

Everywhere I've looked today, it's been about leaving the past there.  My new saying for this year is going to be "That's so 2013!!!!!  Anytime the past comes up, that's going to be my response.  I've learned a lot from 2013 and unresolved things have finally been.  The biggest thing I think I can take away is that I really am OK being by myself.  I have the joint all to me today and I'm loving it.  I took down the tree and put away the train.  I cleaned up a room.  By Sunday, this place will be spotless!

The praise for all this goes to God!  After all, it's His peace, and it's hope in His Word, and faith that His plan for my life will be better than anything I can imagine.  I saw His plan taking shape last week when I realized that it was just closure.  It happened fast but like I said that's so 2013.

Hope.  I haven't had it for so long.  I don't even know what it is that I'm hoping for, but I know I have HOPE!  And that's a wonderfully blessed place to be.

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