It was just that simple...(and I re-wrote this)
ed. note: Sometimes blogging at two a.m. isn't the best time to do things. I was a bit tired and when I had coffee this morning, I thought I'd fix this up a bit.
I sometimes over-think things. I don't mean to, and it's usually limited to things I do not understand. I consider myself at least of average intelligence and have a pretty good command of the English language, or so I thought anyway. I got schooled this evening and in the first five minutes of the lesson, I had something I've been needing for a long, long, time.
The lesson came as they often do; through a radio program. We're in the big hangar again at work so I walked out to my truck at lunch to listen to a program I enjoy. The subject tonight was about what a paradox was.
As soon as he said the word and gave the definition, I knew it perfectly described my situation. Here's a working definition of the word "paradox": A statement or proposition, that, despite sound (or apparently sound) reasoning from acceptable premises, leads to a conclusion that seems senseless, logically unacceptable, or self-contradictory.
Here's my paradox: God hates divorce. I love God and want to follow His commandments. To do that, I gotta not divorce my wife, because He said so in the Bible. I can't ask the wife to divorce me, because that would be causing her to sin. So if I can't do this, or can't do that, without going against God's will, then what do I do?
It's a lot more complicated than that, but the crux of my biggest issue can be oversimplified to just that little seemingly simple, yet not so simple statement. It brings to bear a lot of Christian principles that I get faced with and without going into details, we'll just say some days it's easy, some other days, not so much.
I'd be willing to bet that some of you kind of wonder, with all the speaking I do about the wonderful things God does in my life, why would I think He would want me to stay in a bad situation? The answer to this is going to be a little uncomfortable, but I think these are some of the most important words I could share with my friends, and anyone else who might happen to be reading this. Here goes:
God doesn't change!
He was, is, and will be God. He gave us His word and that's that. It's what we do with it that causes us problems, creates our own little paradoxes in our own life and at least from my own past experience, it's a lot of why what I considered "religious people" made me feel uncomfortable. My idea of what God was, what Christianity was, well I was comfortable with it because it fit what I wanted it to be. Now, I get uncomfortable when I'm not doing what I can to live what God wants it to be.
God can use bad situations for His purposes, His glory. I know that. The Bible is filled with stories of just that. Want to know something? The Bible has a story that touches the edges of my life. Read the first three chapters of Hosea. God used some marital and family circumstances to His glory through Hosea, and there's an illustration of what God thinks of marriage in the beginning of the third chapter.
Does it apply to my life? I can't say for certain, because the opening chapters of the book are used as an example, through Hosea's family life, of God's relationship with Israel. It's a great metaphor!
Let's wrap this thing up today, with some things that might make you uncomfortable, but hopefully make you think. The paradox is what it is. Conventional wisdom can't apply because if I do that, how do I claim to be a Christian? It's another paradox in and of itself. To trust my own wisdom or the practical advice of friends, I'd either have to sin, or ask someone else to sin for my benefit, again, another paradox. The alternative is to suffer through an extremely emotionally challenging, difficult, and honestly sometimes downright hurtful situation, not knowing from day to day what's going to happen in life, and just struggling to keep doing what's right. The simple, painless, sensible way isn't God's way and God doesn't change. That last sentence should make all y'all that say you believe, but would have a tough time finding enough evidence to be convicted in a court of being a Christian, very uncomfortable.
I think that's part of my past problem. I put God in a box that I wanted Him to be in. There when I wanted something, but never any respect for His word. Doing things MY way, not His way. He has a marvelous way of teaching humility, by the way, and His way is so much better. My paradox is a problem that I cannot solve. I don't have the power to do it. If I did, I'd resolve it this afternoon. So what do you do when you have a God sized problem that seemingly has no way out?
Read Proverbs 3:5-6, give the problem to God, and cast your bread on the waters. Then learn patience and trust. When patience runs thin, when things seem impossible, then you just obey. That's where I am with this paradox; the trust and obey stage. I spent 27 years in the military. One thing I've learned is that I don't always have to understand the orders but I do have to follow them. Even when they don't make sense.
I sometimes over-think things. I don't mean to, and it's usually limited to things I do not understand. I consider myself at least of average intelligence and have a pretty good command of the English language, or so I thought anyway. I got schooled this evening and in the first five minutes of the lesson, I had something I've been needing for a long, long, time.
The lesson came as they often do; through a radio program. We're in the big hangar again at work so I walked out to my truck at lunch to listen to a program I enjoy. The subject tonight was about what a paradox was.
As soon as he said the word and gave the definition, I knew it perfectly described my situation. Here's a working definition of the word "paradox": A statement or proposition, that, despite sound (or apparently sound) reasoning from acceptable premises, leads to a conclusion that seems senseless, logically unacceptable, or self-contradictory.
Here's my paradox: God hates divorce. I love God and want to follow His commandments. To do that, I gotta not divorce my wife, because He said so in the Bible. I can't ask the wife to divorce me, because that would be causing her to sin. So if I can't do this, or can't do that, without going against God's will, then what do I do?
It's a lot more complicated than that, but the crux of my biggest issue can be oversimplified to just that little seemingly simple, yet not so simple statement. It brings to bear a lot of Christian principles that I get faced with and without going into details, we'll just say some days it's easy, some other days, not so much.
I'd be willing to bet that some of you kind of wonder, with all the speaking I do about the wonderful things God does in my life, why would I think He would want me to stay in a bad situation? The answer to this is going to be a little uncomfortable, but I think these are some of the most important words I could share with my friends, and anyone else who might happen to be reading this. Here goes:
God doesn't change!
He was, is, and will be God. He gave us His word and that's that. It's what we do with it that causes us problems, creates our own little paradoxes in our own life and at least from my own past experience, it's a lot of why what I considered "religious people" made me feel uncomfortable. My idea of what God was, what Christianity was, well I was comfortable with it because it fit what I wanted it to be. Now, I get uncomfortable when I'm not doing what I can to live what God wants it to be.
God can use bad situations for His purposes, His glory. I know that. The Bible is filled with stories of just that. Want to know something? The Bible has a story that touches the edges of my life. Read the first three chapters of Hosea. God used some marital and family circumstances to His glory through Hosea, and there's an illustration of what God thinks of marriage in the beginning of the third chapter.
Does it apply to my life? I can't say for certain, because the opening chapters of the book are used as an example, through Hosea's family life, of God's relationship with Israel. It's a great metaphor!
Let's wrap this thing up today, with some things that might make you uncomfortable, but hopefully make you think. The paradox is what it is. Conventional wisdom can't apply because if I do that, how do I claim to be a Christian? It's another paradox in and of itself. To trust my own wisdom or the practical advice of friends, I'd either have to sin, or ask someone else to sin for my benefit, again, another paradox. The alternative is to suffer through an extremely emotionally challenging, difficult, and honestly sometimes downright hurtful situation, not knowing from day to day what's going to happen in life, and just struggling to keep doing what's right. The simple, painless, sensible way isn't God's way and God doesn't change. That last sentence should make all y'all that say you believe, but would have a tough time finding enough evidence to be convicted in a court of being a Christian, very uncomfortable.
I think that's part of my past problem. I put God in a box that I wanted Him to be in. There when I wanted something, but never any respect for His word. Doing things MY way, not His way. He has a marvelous way of teaching humility, by the way, and His way is so much better. My paradox is a problem that I cannot solve. I don't have the power to do it. If I did, I'd resolve it this afternoon. So what do you do when you have a God sized problem that seemingly has no way out?
Read Proverbs 3:5-6, give the problem to God, and cast your bread on the waters. Then learn patience and trust. When patience runs thin, when things seem impossible, then you just obey. That's where I am with this paradox; the trust and obey stage. I spent 27 years in the military. One thing I've learned is that I don't always have to understand the orders but I do have to follow them. Even when they don't make sense.
What are biblical reasons or grounds for divorce?
ReplyDeleteThe Bible suggests that “marital unfaithfulness” is the only scriptural reason that warrants God’s permission for divorce and remarriage. Many different interpretations exist among Christian teachings as to the exact definition of "marital unfaithfulness." The Greek word for marital unfaithfulness found in Matthew 5:32 and Matthew 19:9 translates to mean any form of sexual immorality including adultery, prostitution, fornication, pornography, and incest. Since the sexual union is such a crucial part of the marriage covenant, breaking that bond seems to be a permissible, biblical grounds for divorce.
Matthew 5:32
But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, causes her to become an adulteress, and anyone who marries the divorced woman commits adultery. (NIV)
Matthew 19:9
I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, and marries another woman commits adultery. (NIV)
From 1 Corinthians 7:10-11 (NIV) To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband. 11 But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife.
ReplyDeleteYes divorce for adultery is allowed. In my case, however, as far as it's in my power to do so, forgiveness and reconciliation are in order. Sometimes when you ask God what He wants you to do, He'll show you. Whether or not you'll do it us up to you, but remember some of the stories I've written about. Also remember too what happened to Jonah when he didn't like what God told him to do. Jonah couldn't outrun God. I don't intend to try.